Top 11 Cereals

By CJ Tiernan

It has been said that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. The proverbial foundation upon which the rest of the day is built. For some, that foundation is simply a cup of coffee (or one of those things you buy at a coffee store that has coffee in it but the dominant ingredient is like sugar or whipped cream or something). For others, it may be a smörgåsbord of proteins like eggs, bacon, and sausage. I love all sorts of breakfast options. In fact, I'm so stranger to playing the breakfast for dinner card. If you're not in the mood for something you have to make (or gonna be late for school), cereal is always a great option. Below is a list of my Top 11 favorite breakfast cereals of all time (most of which harbor little to no nutritional value but, whatever, I've go two more meals to make up for it. Vegetables are dinners problem).

1. Frosted Flakes

https://www.frostedflakes.com/en_US/home.html, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

Let's be honest. Tony the Tiger wouldn't lie to you. When he says they're great, he ain't lion (get it. 'cause he's a tiger). I absolutely love Frosted Flakes. It has been my favorite cereal of all time since before I could spell my own name (which, again, is two letters long). A perfect crunch, sweet without overwhelming your taste buds, and when you empty the bag at the end of the box: Glorious! A pile of sugar!

2. Honey Bunches of Oats

The texture of the cereal in this one is a lot of fun. There are several things going on. The corn flakes have a good crunch and then, when you get to the titular oat bunch, it's a wonderful delight in your face. I like the mix of different things in this one. It's like when you mix two cereals together. You ever do that as a kid? Or, like, this morning? Yeah, me neither.

3. Reese's Puffs

Confession Time: I'm not a huge Reese's guy. I often find that the peanut butter, which doesn't operate like normal peanut butter, is too overwhelming in the ratio to the chocolate. The only ones that I feel like they got the ratio right in, are the little ones that you unwrap from foil and then take out of the wax paper. However, this cereal? Well, now that is a perfect ratio. The combination of chocolate and peanut butter is the foundation of happy places across the globe and this cereal is its pièce de résistance.

4. Cap'n Crunch

Salute to this cereal. Whether you prefer the Crunch Berries variety, the Peanut Butter version, or this one, the O.G., you trust that captain at the helm. I love this cereal even though it was once the cause of a dislodged brace on my tooth. While the phrase "happy accident" is perhaps overused, it is undeniable that one of the greatest happy accidents in this great nation's storied history occurred in 1997 when the dear sweet people of the Quaker Oats company "accidentally" forgot to add the corn squares and created "Oops! All Berries."

5. Frosted Mini-Wheats

I'm no stranger to eating cereal dry. While it is preferred that it be consumed from a bowl with a spoon, doused in an outrageous dose of milk (or a non-dairy alternative of your choosing), in order to eat it as a snack on the go, I'll pour it down my gullet from a cup. That is not an option with the Frosted Mini-Wheats. One simply must coat each and every biscuit in its entirety and then, like waiting on the conditioner in the shower, let it sit a minute or two before digging in. Worth it. They are so good and, as luck would have it, an excellent source of fiber. Hooray to being regular!

6. Lucky Charms

I love me some lucky charms. You ever feel like eating the regular bits of the cereal is like eating your vegetables to earn the marshmallows? Just me? Cool. Cool, cool, cool. They need to offer up an Oops! All Berries version of this cereal (a cursory glance through the internet reveals I missed out on a contest in 2017 wherein they did indeed award 10,000 such boxes. If you are one of the lucky souls that got your hands on one of those bad boys, well, God hath smiled upon you, child.)

7. Waffle Crisp

Part waffle, part cereal. Sometimes you have to wonder if science has come too far. Like, what did we do to deserve something this awesome? Seriously, every bite, you can taste the maple syrup (do you pronounce it SIR-up or SEAR-up? I'm a SIR-up guy, myself but also pronounce Syracuse as SEAR-a-cuse so I wonder if I need to pick a lane). It is a fun waffle shape with a great crunch. In 2018, they discontinued it and the world grew a little darker. In fact, after the pandemic, Post realized their mistake and brought back this glue of the universe in 2021.

8. Cinnamon Toast Crunch

In the movie "This is the End," they refer to this cereal as C.T. Crunch. Since I first saw that movie, I've struggled to call it anything else. However, that modified moniker does mute its dominant trait: the cinnamon. Oh ho, man, that cinnamon. By the end of a bowl (or three) your milk is a cinnamon-swirl wonderland. The French Toast Crunch alternative is also aces.

9. Honey Nut Chex

Regular Chex are boring and for old people. Life is too short to wade into the waters of just eating a bowl of Corn Chex or Rice Chex (or [clutches pearls] the Wheat Chex). Have some self-respect. Don't forget that life is for the living and enjoy the sweet things in life like Honey Nut Chex. Just the right amount of sweet with a crunch he can you hear from the next room, respectfully.

10. Cocoa Pebbles

Do not settle for imitators. Cocoa Pebbles are superior to Cocoa Krispies (okay, technically Cocoa Krispies were released 13 years before Cocoa Pebbles, making the Pebbles the imitators but, as Barney Stinson famously says, "new is always better"). The magic of the Cocoa Pebbles is that you eat the cereal and then you're left with chocolate milk. It's like second drink.

11. Life

Mikey is not the only one that likes it. Life is just so great. It is one of the few cereals that I enjoy just as much when they are soggy mush as I do when they are crunchy. While the phrase "choose life" is most often associated with religion, politics, and the band Wham!, I'd encourage its use in the grocery store. Here endeth the lesson.

Final Thoughts

The cereal aisle in the grocery store is famously not a spartan locale. There are an awful lot to choose from. While I may be partial to the ones that actually taste good, there are plenty of other options out there for individuals of all walks of life. If there is a variety that I left off my list that you can't go a day without harboring in your pantry, please let me know in the comments section. Thanks!