By CJ Tiernan The delineation I am making here between a Christmas song and a Christmas carol is the content of the song. Carols are religious and often based around the birth of Jesus, while Christmas songs are on the secular side of the equation and don't carry the religious weight of a carol. I am ranking both and you can read my Top 11 Christmas Songs List here. Without further ado, I present my Top 11 favorite Christmas Carols that I've ever heard. Me, Dressed as a Sheppard recreating a reading from church for my grandparents, December 2003 1. O Holy Night O Holy Night is easily my favorite Christmas carol. I have this song by like 20 different artists on my Christmas songs playlist. The cool thing about this song, is that it allows the talent of a great singer to shine through. It is a dynamic song that can showcase some range. The "O night divine" lines at the end: goosebumps! 2. Carol of the Bells Mannheim Steamroller probably perfected this song. There version is so great and is performed essentially without lyrics (there are some words that are more like vocal effects). When I sang this one in Junior High choir, I was surprised to find there were lyrics. My favorite part about this song is the drama and tension. There is an energy that drives the song and conjures a charming cacophony (in a good way). 3. Mary, Did You Know? I first heard this song by the band Pentatonix. Years later, I would come to find that they covered the song and it wasn't originally theirs. As has happened so many times in music before, they didn't write it but they did perfect it. This song is heartwarming and beautiful. I've also heard it done well before as a solo piece. 4. O Come All Ye Faithful I remember singing this one in church. It has big "Christmas morning" vibes. Listening to a bunch of people sing this one is really satisfying. I also enjoy getting to use the word "Ye." It feels very pirate. Who doesn't love the juxtaposition of a pirate on Christmas? 5. Hark! The Herald Angels Sing My favorite thing on this song is the elements of a call and response. It feels like the type of song where one side of the room sings and then the other side responds. It is a very cool effect. It is also a joyous, upbeat song, which is always my favorite flavor of song. 6. What Child Is This This is a slower song than I'm typically into, but I really enjoy the lullaby quality of it. What Child Is This is crafted in such a way it almost seems like a lullaby being sung to J-sauce himself in the manger. However, when we get to that chorus, oh baby you can really belt it. 7. Joy to the World John Mulaney has a great stand-up bit about "the best meal he ever had" in which he jokes about Tom Jones' What's New Pussycat starting subtly. I feel the same would apply here. Joy to the World starts with a triumphant chorus of "Joy to the World." It is wonderful and impactful. I, however, never remember any of the lyrics after the first verse. Does anyone? 8. God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen The beat of this song is like the time in English class when we had to learn about Emily Dickinson (gross!) and iambic pentameter. "Because I could not stop for death it kindly stopped for me." It's very up, down, up, down. I like it (the song, not Emily Dickinson). Singing this song is like riding a vocal roller coaster (Vocal Roller Coaster: dibs on that as my band name). 9. The First Noël Noël is French for Christmas. So this song is singing about the first Christmas (a.k.a. the birth of Christ). I like that it doesn't follow Joesph and Mary but rather the wise men. We also get images of Shepards and angels to really paint the scene. It is a very visual song. 10. O Come, O Come Emmanuel This song is fun because it has Gregorian chant vibes. It seems to ape the tenor of the Kyrie prayer during the service. I really enjoy the energy of the refrain. I do, however, question the decision to rhyme Emmanuel with Israel. Did they think we wouldn't notice? 11. Angels We Have Heard on High Angels are a fascinating piece of religious imagery. It's already a struggle to have faith and believe in... a lot, and your solve is to add in flying characters? [Tony Romo voice] "I don't know, Jim." The chorus of this one is marvelous, though. "Gloria in excelsis Deo." For one, never enough opportunities to speak a dead language. You gotta take those ops whenever they pop up. Second, it's a real treat to hold the line on a single word for so long. "Gloria" is sung, if my math is right, for 18 notes. How fun is that? It reminds me of the time I went to see Weird Al in concert at an outdoor stage (I didn't have a ticket, I just stood outside the venue for the last couple of songs) and a train drove by while he was singing "The Saga Begins" and he simply held the note until the train went by. The train was right behind me so it felt like Weird Al was looking right at me. What a moment. Anyway, Angels We Have Heard on High = good! 12. Do You Hear What I Hear? Okay. I messed up. I originally wrote this list and forgot number 3: Mary, Did You Know? As a result, I had to shift the rest down. Please enjoy the presence of the rare 12th item on my Top 11 list. The chorus of this song is so beautiful, musically. It is fun because it has different lyrics every time, only the music remains the same. Even the line that constitutes the title of the song changes from "do you hear what I hear?" to "do you see what I see?" to "do you know what I know?" to finally "Listen to what I say." It is very cool Final Thoughts I'm not an overly religious person but with Christmas as my favorite holiday, I can't escape the carols. In fact, I love me the carols! There are so many great and beautiful ones. Whether singing them as a congregation in a church, door to door as a caroler, or to yourself as you bring in the groceries, it is a real pleasure to both hear and sing these songs. I love them and I hope you do too. If you have some favorite Christmas carols that I left off my list, please let me know in the comments. Thank you and Merry Christmas!

By CJ Tiernan This will be a list of Christmas Songs that skew more toward the secular side of Christmas or don't qualify as Christmas Carols. I also tried to choose only songs by the original artist, as there have been countless covers of the best Christmas songs over the years. I have a separate list for Christmas Carols, which you can view by clicking here. There was also an effort made to reduce the number of repeat artists, as my taste in Christmas music is relegated largely to the eclectic mix of Pentatonix, Alabama Christmas (I'm not a big country music guy, but this album is steeped in childhood nostalgia for me), and TSO (Trans-Siberian Orchestra). I love Christmas music and I've heard the same songs over and over for years and years and never tire of them. I also enjoy it when I encounter a new one. Christmas music is unmistakable. There's just an air of magic to it. Below is a list of my Top 11 favorite Christmas Songs I've ever heard. Me and my two youngest siblings performing see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil, December 2001 1. Wizards in Winter - Trans-Siberian Orchestra Christmas doesn't usually walk hand in hand with hard rock. As someone who enjoys hard rock, I'd declare that a shame. Nevertheless, TSO stepped out of the shadows, said "Hold my beer," and made this head-banging Christmas classic. It is rare for me to encounter a song without lyrics that I really enjoy. I like to belt along from the mountain tops when listening to a song. A song without lyrics? What is this, Bach? But, it works so well. It is both heavy and yet feels Christmasy. Impressive. 2. Santa Claus (I Still Believe in You) - Alabama I don't really enjoy country music. There are certain songs that have poked through the denim veneer and made it to me over the years, but they are few and far between. However, I love the Alabama Christmas album. It takes me back to my youth, as a kid in the backseat of the van on our way to Disney World (driving from Iowa to Florida) in the middle of the night. Plus, there is a lyric my siblings and I like to quote. "...and grandma and grandpa, just lookin' young, and lovin' life..." 3. You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch - Thurl Ravenscroft This movie is a classic and this song has stood the test of time. There are so many vivid, hideous images conjured from this song. "Arsenic sauce," "39-and-a-half foot pole," and "you have termites in your smile." It is so cool that it's socially acceptable for one to simply sing along to this song just as they would Frosty the Snowman. What a world we live in. 4. The 12 Days of Christmas - Straight No Chaser This song is a comedic Christmas medley. It mixes in classics like Rudolph, The 12 Days of Christmas, Jingle Bells. Even The Dreidel Song takes a quick step into the spotlight. Then it goes off the rails. It ends to the tune of Africa by Toto. It is very funny, a great way to touch upon a bunch of Christmas Classics in short succession, and highly worthy of your time. 5. Christmas Eve / Sarajevo 12/24 - Trans-Siberian Orchestra This song is largely a mashup of two Christmas carols: Carol of the Bells and God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen. And yet, I'm putting it on my Christmas Songs list because it works so well and is so beautiful as a song I simply couldn't bring myself to leave it off. It is a softer song than Wizards in Winter but no less musically wondrous. 6. Believe - Josh Groban From the 2004 film Polar Express, we have this lovely ditty from the golden pipes of Josh Groban. Belief and faith, much as is the case in religion, is a big theme in the secular Christmas involving Santa Claus. Believe is a lovely encapsulation of the movie's message of recapturing a childlike sense of wonder and hope. 7. Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree - Brenda Lee This song contains fun noises. There is some rockin' saxophone going on here. The fact that Brenda Lee was only 13 years old when she recorded this song is bananas. There is a level of rasp that I would've assumed is only generated from decades of chain-smoking (she must have started young). This song has so much energy. It's the one used in Home Alone when our boy Kev is moving cardboard Michael Jordan around the Christmas tree. 8. It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year - Andy Williams It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year is my mom's favorite Christmas song. It's not hard to tell why. The joyful horns and chimes that lead into the start of the song get you in the holiday spirit right off the bat. Plus, Andy Williams offers a voice that works well for the situation (It also sounds like it would work well as the disembodied voice on a game show). 9. That's Christmas to Me - Pentatonix Pentatonix has about 50 songs that I love and considered putting on this list. I was trying to restrict the list to original songs (and already kinda failed twice) so this is my favorite original by them. That being said, Mary, Did You Know?, Hallelujah, and Carol of the Bells are all unbelievable covers. Harmony and vocal percussion are two awesome musical weapons that Pentatonix has under such complete control they need a license to carry when they go on tour. 10. A Candle in the Window - Alabama So many country songs strike me as songs that were titled first, and then written around the pun in the title. It tends to be that one-note effort that pushes me away from country (along with superfluous twang). Therefore, I feel a little sheepish in celebrating this song, as it appears to have simply added an "ow" to the end of a famous Elton John song (and an "A" at the beginning). But no, I feel it delivers a powerful and universal message. The line "It don't take a lot of money, to know what riches are. Just a candle in the window, and Christmas in your heart" is a perfect message and I don't tire of listening to it (or warbling through it myself). 11. Christmas Wrapping - The Waitresses The '80s were a wild time. I turned 2 years old in 1990 so I don't have any first hand memories of the '80s, only the glowing relics that pop culture has clung to and idolized. Through the music of the '80s, however, we are gifted a glimpse of the past. What a time it must have been. In a time when Perry Como and Dean Martin ditties weren't yet classics, we got this Christmas gift of a song. A New Wave song about Christmas that is part '80s pop, part Rom Com. What's not to love? Final Thoughts My current Christmas playlist has 194 songs in it. As such, it was tremendously difficult to pare down to 11. I will leave a list of a few songs that just missed the cut down below, but please set me straight in the comments if I missed your favorite one. I love Christmas so much. Getting to spend time with loved ones is simply a joyous gift every single year. I hope your Christmas is merry and your News Years is bright and filled with hope and love. Thanks! Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) - Darlene Love You Make It Feel Like Christmas - Gwen Stefani Candy Cane Lane - Sia Thistlehair The Christmas Bear - Alabama Christmas in Dixie - Alabama Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer - Gene Autry All I Want for Christmas is You - Mariah Carey It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas - Perry Como & The Fontane Sisters

By CJ Tiernan Since the beginning of time, bags of chips have served humanity as both loyal side dishes and munchies quenchers. They've walked hand in hand with cold sandwiches inside lunch boxes nationwide, presented splashes of color at picnics and barbecues, and waded through the cartoon-fueled waters of after-school snacks. They are crunchy and delightful and always welcome (except maybe inside a library. Shhhh!). While it can be difficult to select a bag of chips in the grocery aisle due to the sheer volume and breadth of choices, have no fear! CJ is here! Below is a list of my Top 11 favorite Chips of all time. 1. Sun Chips (Garden Salsa) Famartin, CC BY-SA 4.0 , via Wikimedia Commons Overall, I'm not a Sun Chips guy. Or at least, I wasn't when I was a kid (I haven't dared to try them lately). Who has the unmitigated gull to go and bring whole wheat to the chip bowl? (Hello! I'm trying to eat here). However, they simply found perfection with the Garden Salsa flavor. Unless forced to share, I've yet to pop open a bag and not down its contents in their entirety, on a solo mission. Garden Salsa Sun Chips are simply too good. The 11 herbs and spices or whatever that they sprinkle on those things are magical. Because they've made Cheeto dust and Cinnamon Toast Crunch cinnamon sugar commercially available outside of their original product, I believe the Garden Salsa seasoning must be next. In the immortal words of Michael Scott "you have one day" (They always give an ultimatum). 2. Doritos (Cool Ranch) There is famously a debate betwixt Cool Ranch and Nacho Cheese (or Cooler Ranch and Nacho Cheesier as I grew up knowing them). Pish posh, I say. They're both great. Enjoy whichever you please. But just understand, I favor the Cool Ranch. CJ = C = Cool = Cool Ranch. Nacho Cheese = N = Not Cool. The Math doesn't lie. I double-checked it like a certain North Pole list. 3. Cheetos (Crunchy) Jeff Eaton, CC BY-SA 2.0 , via Wikimedia Commons The downside to Cheetos is the orange fingers. A residue develops that stains anything you touch and leaves evidence that you just wolfed down a bag of Cheetos (unless you deploy the veteran move of pouring them straight down the gullet like a cartoon bird). The upside, is everything else. Cheetos are a delicious splash of cheese in crunchy form. Please enjoy away from your keyboard for maximum efficiency. 4. Lays/Ruffles/Pringles (Barbecue) Famartin, CC BY-SA 4.0 , via Wikimedia Commons I'm not a stickler for the brand here. Lays are the O.G., Ruffles have ridges, and with Pringles, we all know that once you pop, the fun don't stop. A mustachioed disembodied head on the side of a tube would never steer you wrong. Barbecue is my go to. It is very flavorful and works well alongside other barbecue fare or can stand up on its own. 5. Doritos (Spicy Sweet Chili) These are the real Johnny-Come-Lately on my list, at least relatively speaking, but aw man did they make an entrance. I like a little kick with my food and this one provides just the right amount of kick to allow you to enjoy the flavor without having to go one-for-one on chips and sips (of water). Plus, it's in a purple bag. What a fun wrinkle (and not at all a move to subconsciously compare it to Takis)! 6. Lays/Ruffles/Pringles (Sour Cream and Onion) Famartin, CC BY-SA 4.0 , via Wikimedia Commons Again, the brand (and they hate when you say this) is irrelevant. The important thing is that you hit that sweet balance between the smoothness of the sour cream and the karate chop of the onion. Magical flavor crystals traverse the seven seas of your taste buds and lap upon the shores of your olfactory system. I can't describe it any better than to say it's wonderful. 7. Fritos Mx. Granger, CC0, via Wikimedia Commons Trusty, delicious Fritos have been around forever. They've accompanied variety packs since the advent of the variety pack and were invented way back in 1932. We had Fritos longer than McDonald's or Ferrari or late night television. The secret? It's only 3 ingredients. That's right, Fritos are simply made with corn, vegetable oil, and salt. That's it. Those are basically the same ingredients in corn on the cob. Did we just discover that Fritos are a vegetable? 8. Cheetos (Puffy) Mike Mozart from Funny YouTube, USA, CC BY 2.0 , via Wikimedia Commons I know, I know. I'm stepping on another landmine here. Crunchy Cheetos vs. Puffy Cheetos. While I placed the crown upon the metaphorical head of Crunchy Cheetos, the Puffy ones deserve a place on the podium. I like to use my teeth to saw them down in middle almost all the way through and make it look like a tree that a beaver is about to fell. Or perhaps, an hourglass holding time hostage while I play with my food. A delicious, cheesy mess (which happens to be a great way to describe both me and the Cheetos). 9. Doritos (Nacho Cheese) Jeangagnon, CC BY-SA 4.0 , via Wikimedia Commons I promised they were on the list and here they are. While not the best Dorito variety (is a Dorito the singular of Doritos?), I do quite enjoy these. They stain your fingers more than the Cool Ranch (and less than Cheetos) and the flavor is a little more muted, but altogether it's a great chip. In fact, I highly recommend using them as your chip-base when making nachos. It will up your game (you're welcome!). 10a. Tostitos (Bite Size Rounds) Famartin, CC BY-SA 4.0 , via Wikimedia Commons I'm not gonna sit here and pretend to know why, but of all the tortilla chip varieties at the grocery store, this one is my fave. It's a flawless salt ratio, an exquisite crunch, and the whole thing fits cleanly in your mouth in one bite. There is no need to turn it blue, add a dash of lime, or shape it into a triangle. These actions will only mess with perfection. 10b. Tostitos (Other Varieties) Famartin, CC BY-SA 4.0 , via Wikimedia Commons At the end of the day, a tortilla chip is a tortilla chip. While I sang the praises of the best variety above, they're all wonderful and more than deserving of being plunged into the icy depths of salsa or trudging through some hearty guacamole. Heck, I'm no stranger to throwing some on a plate, burying them in cheese, and then nuking it in the microwave for insta-nachos. 11. Lays/Ruffles/Pringles (Cheddar and Sour Cream) Cheddar and Sour Cream chips are great, but you have to be in the mood. You can't force them upon someone, they've got to come to you. They can be a little heavy-handed with the flavor and you've got to get the seat in the full and upright position before making the descent. However, when you're game, it hits. Aw man, what a delight. Be careful not to fall asleep on the couch right after without brushing your teeth. While not as bad as the time I had Au Gratin potato chips and took a nap, it can leave your breath with the power to ward off vampires and friends alike. Final Thoughts I thought about throwing "poker chips" in there somewhere as a curveball answer, but that would have been disrespectful to you. You came here to know which chips are the best and we all knew what I meant. Plus, chips are facsimile for money, not the real thing, and I usually lose them at the table anyway so it's a bit of a love-hate relationship there. Anyway, chips are delicious. Eat chips (do they have a breakfast chip option, I wonder? Nope, wait, I take it back. That's dumb. It's just cereal before you put the milk in. Withdrawn... Please stop looking a me). These are my favorites that I've ever tried but there are so many different flavors I'm sure your list differs from my own. Please let me know in the comments where I dropped the ball. Thanks!

By CJ Tiernan Whether written for adults or kids, there are certain movies and stories that follow groups of children as their main characters. It can be difficult for a film production to thrust children in to the center of the stage for several reasons. One is simply that there are child labor laws that limit how much a child actor can work in a day, limiting your window to film a scene (ah, the good old days. When you could send a child into the mines and have them work a double for half a sixpence a week). Another reason is that it is hard to find a great child actor. They lack the experience to draw on, to be able to create and embody a character. However, when you do hit on a child actor, it really elevates the movie, even more so when you hit multiple times. Below is a list of my 11 favorite acting ensembles by children in movies that I've ever seen. 1. Super 8 (2011) This movie was created by J.J. Abrams as an homage to the Sci-Fi of his childhood and to filmmaker extraordinaire Steven Spielberg (who did actually produce the movie). It felt very much like a throw-back to the '80s with one notable exception. The kid actors were remarkable. Elle Fanning steals the show as Alice, but fellow child actors Zach Mills, Riley Griffiths, and Ryan Lee are also great. I'm also a sucker for the "film within a film" troupe, and watching the kids filming a story completely independent of adults is very fun. 2. Moonrise Kingdom (2012) Raffi Asdourian, CC BY 2.0 , via Wikimedia Commons Written and Directed by Wes Anderson, you know this movie is going to be weird and visually stunning. It is further elevated by the performances of the two main characters, played by Jared Gilman and Kara Hayward. They are 12-year-olds at a summer camp, located on an island, that run away to spend time with one another. It is a beautiful story and you get completely lost in their performances. It's also worth watching for the delightful adult performances by Wes Anderson mainstays: Jason Schwartzman, Edward Norton, and Bill Murrary, plus Andersonian newbies Bruce Willis and Frances McDormand. 3. The Kings of Summer (2013) This is a lovely story about 3 childhood friends hanging out in the woods all summer. Pushed to their limit by suffocating (read loving) parents, they run away from home and are trying to build a house and live off the land. It is a fun story that has heart and comedy. Nick Robinson, Gabriel Basso, and Moises Arias are the main kids with Erin Moriarty (of The Boys) also in the film. This is a coming-of-age story with all the delightful twists and turns of childhood. 4. It (2017) A horror movie is not an abnormal place to find a great performance by a child actor. Going all the way back to "The Omen" and "The Exorcist" back in the '70s, you find great performances by child actors in horror movies. This one, however, has my favorite ensemble. There are a lot of kids in "It" with tremendous performances. It also takes place in the '80s, so I seem to be a sucker for a throwback. Watching kids get bullied, whether in movies or TV shows, is really hard for me. I'm empathetic enough to want to jump in and stop it. But, to watch the bullied kids rise up to try and defeat a supernatural clown is quite satisfying. 5. Hugo (2011) Asa Butterfield and Chloë Grace Moretz not only steal the show in this movie, they are the show. The movie is based on the children's book The Invention of Hugo Cabret and directed by Martin Scorsese so what more could you want? How about a mystery, a robot-thing called an automaton, and Sasha Baron Cohen playing a French cop? The movie is visually stunning and the performances will blow you away. 6. Signs (2002) This is my favorite M. Night Shyamalan film. It's a lot funnier than "The Sixth Sense" while also being a more compelling story than "The Lady in the Water." The performances of Rory Culkin and Abigail Breslin are fantastic in this movie. Along with Joaquin Phoenix, they steal the show (especially once the tin-foil hats show up). It's a story of love and loss intermingled with an alien invasion. I highly recommend it. 7. School of Rock (2003) Obviously Jack Black as the fake Ned Schneebly and real Dewey Finn is the bee's knees in this one, but the ensemble of a classroom full of kids more than hold their own. This is the first of back-to-back Richard Linklater films on this list and they have very different vibes. This one is a comedy and musical following a guy who was kicked out of his band, pretends to be a substitute teacher (his roommate), and molds his Elementary School class into a rock band (while hiding it from the principal). This movie will give you a serious case of "Stick-it-to-da-man-neosis." 8. Boyhood (2014) This movie almost, sorta doesn't belong on the list. The child (the "boy" in "Boyhood") actor in this one is mainly one person, but his performance is so good it bears mentioning and there are certainly other children in this one. If you're unaware of the concept, this movie follows a child from Elementary School to the start of College. It was shot over the course of just over a decade, so the same actor(s) could be used for the character(s) throughout. Revolutionary! The actor in question is Ellar Coltrane. Elijah Smith and Richard Linklater's own daughter, Lorelei, round out the list of child actors. Awesome performances all around. Oh, also: Patricia Arquette won an Oscar for her performance so she wasn't too shabby either. 9. Little Giants (1994) I grew up on this movie. The underdog sports movie is always a heartening genre. This one follows a group of kids who are great at football against a group of kids who are wearing football uniforms. The kid performances are terrific and comedic, as are the two adult leads: Rick Moranis and Ed O'Neill. Plus the movie brought us a new name for the fumblerooski: The Annexation of Puerto Rico. 10. Holes (2003) A Disney movie makes an appearance! I loved the book (also called Holes) when I was a kid so when I found out they were making a movie, I was excited. It did not disappoint. Shia LaBeouf plays the main character, Stanley Yelnats, but the cast is littered with fun performances of characters like Armpit, Squid, X-Ray, Zig-Zag, Twitch, Magnet, Barfbag, and Zero. The adult cast is robust, consisting of Jon Voight, Tim Blake Nelson, Henry "The Fonz" Winkler, Patricia Arquette, Dulé Hill, and Sigourney Weaver. Good family flick! 11. Harry Potter Series (2001-2011) What? You were worried I was gonna leave Harry Potter off the list? Pish posh! This film series spanning 11 years and 8 movies, is absolutely full of child actors. And while the holy trinity of Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, and Rupert Grint run the show, the movies are absolutely littered with talented actors, old and young. These movies are magical and eminently rewatchable and I highly recommend the lot. Final Thoughts Movies featuring a group of child actors has a certain level of charm and magic. The performances, when done well, can really be quite arresting. I'm sure I left some of your favorites off my list, so please let me know in the comments where I failed you. The '90s movie "Heavyweights" is the one I just left off my list, but there are so many other great ones. Thanks!

By CJ Tiernan This list, as most lists are (at least on this site), is pretty arbitrary. Left Field Alert! I have selected celebrities with varied histories and put them up against one another without really revealing my criteria. They're just people whose names and/or bodies of work I enjoy or respect. Heck, I might just be digging on their vibes. Anyway, here is a list of my 11 favorite celebrities that have an animal in their name. 1. Robin Williams Birth Name: Robin McLaurin Williams Animal: Robin - Bird Reason They're Famous: Actor/Comedian Reason They Made My List: Williams is one of my favorite actors of all time. He could go so big and so broad with his humor, but he could also be so sincere. His dramatic roles were so powerful. His range was unbelievable. He started as a comedian, with one of the fastest minds of all time, and was a wiz at improv. His body of work is unique for its breadth and, when watching one of his movies, you will inevitably feel his warm presence. 2. Flea Birth Name: Michael Peter Balzary Animal: Flea - Bug Reason They're Famous: Musician/Actor - Bassist of Red Hot Chili Peppers Reason They Made My List: Okay, so he wasn't born Flea, but he was called Flea since he was a teenager for his inability to sit still. He was likened to a Flea and the name stuck. He grew up in Australia, which is cool, but he makes my list because of his ability to "Slappa da Bass!" His funk/slap bass skills with RHCP reign as all-time epic. Plus, he appeared in the Back to the Future sequels. 3. Tony Hawk Joseph Gall, CC BY-SA 4.0 , via Wikimedia Commons Birth Name: Anthony Frank Hawk Animal: Hawk - Bird Reason They're Famous: Professional Skateboarder Reason They Made My List: Tony Hawk has had a really delightful post-career presence on Twitter. He is an observer of life who is able to very comedically deliver a snapshot of the world around him. In his playing career, he was an innovator and a winner. He created an incredible number of tricks in the vertical and street skateboarding arenas. He also lent his namesake to a great series of video games. As a bonus, his nickname was "Birdman," so he checks the animal box two times. 4. Snoop Dogg Birth Name: Calvin Cordozar Broadus Jr. Animal: Dog(g) - Mammal Reason They're Famous: Rapper/Actor Reason They Made My List: Pure vibes here. Snoop has appeared most in my life as a pitchman, which is kind of a weird turn for a rapper and marijuana enthusiast. Weirder still was his team-up with fellow reformed criminal Martha Stewart. I'm not someone who listens to his music, but I'm absolutely a fan of the vibe he puts into the world. Bonus: one of the many nicknames he has gone by was Snoop Lion, another animal. 5. Michael J. Fox Birth Name: Michael Andrew Fox Animal: Fox - Mammal Reason They're Famous: Actor Reason They Made My List: He starred in one of my favorite movies of all time: Back to the Future. Everything about that movie was cool, which means that he's cool (transitive property). He has transitioned largely to activist in the latter half of his life after being diagnosed with Parkinson's disease. For most of us, he is the face and voice for a disease that we don't fully understand and has no cure. But I buried the lead: He goes by Michael "J." Fox and his middle name is Andrew. What!? A cursory glance through Google reveals that the choice stems from the weird rules The Screen Actors Guild harbors that prohibit multiple actors going by the same stage name. "Michael Fox" was already taken, and our boy, a Canadian born actor, feared the jokes of Michael "Eh?" Fox if he opted for the "A." Whoa, this is heavy. 6. Jamie Foxx Birth Name: Eric Marlon Bishop Animal: Fox(x) - Mammal / Marlon - Fish (Marlin) Reason They're Famous: Actor/Comedian/Singer Reason They Made My List: I haven't really followed his career as a stand-up comedian or his music. However, I have found him to be a tremendous actor. Obviously, I'm not going out on a limb calling a guy a great actor who has twice been nominated for an Oscar (Winning in 2005 for his portrayal of Ray Charles in "Ray"), but I've enjoyed him in a bunch of films. Horrible Bosses, Collateral, Soul, Baby Driver, and Django Unchained are a handful of his greatest movies. He is great at flipping between comedy and drama, as one would expect from a man with so many slashes in his bio. 7. Tiger Woods Birth Name: Eldrick Tont Woods Animal: Tiger - Big Cat Reason They're Famous: Professional Golfer Reason They Made My List: The greatest golfer I've ever seen! If he was playing, then golf was worth watching on TV. If he wasn't, it wasn't. From the Sunday red to the killer instinct he was, to borrow the modern parlance, built different. Now he did have a pretty epic fall from grace, so I can't have him too high on my list, but he was a real treat to watch. His dad called him Tiger as a kid and my dad called me Tiger as a kid, so I happen to hold a soft spot in my heart for this guy. 8. Sheryl Crow Birth Name: Sheryl Suzanne Crow Animal: Crow - Bird Reason They're Famous: Musician - Singer/Songwriter Reason They Made My List: The radio was littered with her songs throughout the '90s and into the aughts. From "All I Wanna Do" to "Soak Up the Sun," she was out there spitting soft rock hits. "Everyday is a Winding Road," "If It Makes You Happy," and "Strong Enough" are more of her many hits. She was great at creating musical optimism, and won 9 Grammys in the process. Respect! 9. Seal Birth Name: Seal Henry Olusegun Olumide Adeola Samuel Animal: Seal - Aquatic Mammal Reason They're Famous: Musician - Singer/Songwriter Reason They Made My List: Another Musician! And Seal was actually his birth name! (along with a handsome number of other names that make me glad I'm typing this instead of having to butcher those names aloud. You know, the ones between Henry and Samuel). I feel like I only know "Kiss From a Rose" by him, but that one song has had some staying power. He has a beautiful voice and a very distinct face. Apparently, those scars are a result of a flavor of Lupus. Omar Epps would have never guessed. 10. Raven-Symoné Birth Name: Raven-Symoné Christina Pearman Animal: Raven - Bird Reason They're Famous: Actor/Singer Reason They Made My List: "That's So Raven" is the reason she made the list. A Disney Channel TV show that ran while I was in High School, this show starred Raven as Raven. She was a high school student with psychic abilities that gave her flashes of the future. I don't know that I'd enjoy it today, but back then: it slapped. She did also have a recurring role in the TV show Blackish, which was great. 11. Newt Gingrich Birth Name: Newton Leroy McPherson Animal: Newt - Amphibian Reason They're Famous: American Politician Reason They Made My List: Confession time: I don't really follow politics. Like, at all. I don't appreciate the binary nature of a two-party system and the divisiveness that it inherently foments in our country. I do, however, like a sweet name. Newt is an awesome name. Even though I don't know anything about his politics, and I don't care enough to Google it, he sneaks onto the list. Final Thoughts Your list could differ dramatically from my own. Isn't that fun! I considered a smattering of other celebrity names, which I will list below, but these 11 were my faves. Please feel free to include your own in the comments. It is a weird and unnecessary topic, which is right up my alley. Thank you for your time! Megan Fox: Fox - Mammal John Cougar Mellancamp: Cougar - Big Cat Kat Dennings: Cat - Mammal Teri Garr: Gar - Fish Bear Grylls: Bear - Mammal Cat Stevens: Cat - Mammal Lance Bass: Bass - Fish

By CJ Tiernan We've all had a moment when watching a movie where we saw something that doesn't exist in our world and thought "aw man, I wish that was real." Whether a place, a person, or a thing, we've all had that desire. For me, it is often the mode of transportation the characters use. I just want for there to be flying cars already. C'mon, people. Let's make flying cars a thing. In lieu of that reality, we can simply appreciate all the cool stuff we see on screen (and be thankful for what we do have, I guess). Below is a list of my Top 11 favorite Cars that I can ever remember seeing in a movie or a TV show. 1. DeLorean - Back to the Future Me and the DeLorean at Universal Studios Orlando, July 2017 I can't decide if it's better or worse for Back to the Future that the DeLorean is a largely failed organization. I think the rarity of the car makes it even more singular. The gull wing doors, the flux-capacitor, the metal exterior all lead to an unbelievable aesthetic. Add in the fact that it can travel through time, and this car is the dopest of the dope. Doc Brown took a car known as a commercial flop and spun it into the greatest car in pop culture history. 2. Chitty Chitty Bang Bang - Chitty Chitty Bang Bang John, CC BY-SA 2.0 , via Wikimedia Commons This is another reclamation success story. Caractacus Potts (Dick Van Dyke) buys this hunk of junk off the side of the road or a junkyard or something and turns it in to a grand marvel of a car. It can fly and float on water and carries the Potts family to far away places. It's unique, foldable wings and facade as a former race car create such a unique look. Even though this movie came out in the '60s, I'd still sign up for this car today (except that I don't know how to drive stick very well so I don't know if that would be a great idea). 3. Batmobile - Batman Ank Kumar, CC BY-SA 4.0 , via Wikimedia Commons There are many to choose from here. You've got the heavily-modified 1955 Lincoln Futura Concept Car that Adam West and Burt Ward cruised around inside of during the TV show. The one from the Tim Burton movies that is like 90% front-end with just enough space in the back for a rocket engine and Michael Keaton. There's the Tumbler from the Christopher Nolan trilogy. And not to be out done, we have the muscle car from Robert Pattinson's The Batman. Regardless of which is your favorite (I'd go with the Tim Burton one for the look or the Tumbler for practicality) they are simply awesome. They have gadgets up the wazoo and they're built to go really fast. Sometimes they even fly (or at least fall with style) or turn into motorcycle. In a word: Iconic. 4. Mystery Machine - Scooby-Doo Lord Laitinen, CC BY-SA 4.0 , via Wikimedia Commons The coolest van that has ever happened is the Mystery Machine. While we've all been conditioned to avoid suspicious vans and strangers with candy, this bad boy is grandfathered in on the good side. Four young adults and their dog solving mysteries uninvited is absolutely totally casual. Some might go so far as to call it the norm. How else do supernatural mysteries (that ultimately turn out to be a white guy with a makeup and wardrobe budget) even get solved? The meddling masters of the Mystery Machine, that's how (and a pup named Scooby-Doo). 5. Mach 5 - Speed Racer TaurusEmerald, CC BY-SA 4.0 , via Wikimedia Commons The Mach 5 is tricked out to the gills. It's like if all the fun things that got added to the vehicles in Pimp My Ride were practical and placed inside of an already functioning race car (and deployable at the press of a button). The title character (his name is actually Speed and his parents built the race car themselves so one could genuinely argue that he was built for speed) is attempting to win a race and is always up against some conniving organization or corrupt syndicate that is trying to rig the race and win by dirty tricks. As such, they justify using trinkets, doodads, and gadgets (like using jacks to jump over something or being able to become bullet proof or to turn the car into a submarine). They are defensive, not offensive, implements so I guess the cheating is okay. Plus, Speed's younger brother has a pet chimp and his older brother races under an alias so Speed is the chill one of the family. 6. The Magic School Bus - The Magic School Bus Ms. Frizzle's magical mode of moving kids is fantastic. It can be shrunk down small enough to traverse the inside of a human being or travel through time to bypass teaching and learn from the sources like Galileo and Einstein or just cruise the ocean floor checking on the coral. I'm now realizing that almost every single one of my favorite cars can also fly and survive travel through water. Seriously, when will they just make flying cars. I feel like the Jetsons promised us flying cars way back in the '60s and we're still waiting (FYI, because the flying car in the Jetsons never drives on land and only flies - and folds into a briefcase - I did not include it on my cars list and will wait to deploy it on a similar list for spacecraft and/or attachés). Write your local congresswoman, people. We've got to be the change we want to see in the world. Flying cars! Flying cars! 7. Light Cycle - Tron dalvenjah from USA, CC BY-SA 2.0 , via Wikimedia Commons I'm a big advocate for people staying alive, so I'm not a huge fan of the destructive nature of the glowing trails left behind from a Light Cycle. They seem to be designed specifically to permanently erase data from the game (so when a human becomes digitized, it can be fatal). Other than that, these things are sick. They seem to go so fast and, at least in the sequels, are sleek and stylish. I am willing to accept a debate that a cycle is not a car, as a separate motorcycle license (and thus a separate trip to the DMV) is required to operate it. Feh. My list, my rules. 8. Ecto-1 - Ghostbusters mark6mauno, CC BY 2.0 , via Wikimedia Commons An ambulance/hearse is a unique choice for the go-to vehicle of supernatural-vanquishing superheroes but that's the '80s for ya. The '80s were weird, man. Also, the original script for the movie (written by Dan Aykroyd) was WAY more insane than the finished product and about 100 pages longer (still shorter than his first script for the Blues Brothers which was 324 pages long). Plus, it was called Ghost Smashers, which is somehow even more sexual than the line from the theme song that says, and I'm quoting here, "busting makes me feel good." Anyway, the aesthetic of both the movie and the car is stupendously remarkable. 9. Bumblebee - Transformers Bumblebee and I at the Children's Museum of Indianapolis, August 2013 To be fair to the Michael Bay version of Bumblebee, those Camaros are quite lovely even when they aren't "robots in disguise." However, when they are, they're even cooler. I like the use of the radio as the method of communication. It's a fun quirk. Plus, as an Iowa Hawkeye fan, I love me that black and gold color scheme. Additionally, as it seems that Bumblebee ends up in charge of protecting a civilian all the time, it seems excellent that he's great at driving. Both Transformers (2007) and Bumblebee (2018) are in my Top 200 movies of all time, so I am partial to those iterations. I didn't watch the show as a kid. I am aware that it was originally a VW Bug, though, so quite an upgrade in my humble opinion (IMHO). 10. Turtle Van - Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Me with two of my siblings, Halloween 1993 (I'm the one on the right dressed as a Ninja Turtle) Speaking of watching TV shows as a kid (and strap in for an old reference here), my parents used to take me to Blockbuster Video to rent VHS copies of the late '80s TV show. It was wonderful. Leonardo was my guy. Apparently, in the original text (it was a comic book, but I hold it such high regard I refer to it the same way one might refer to The Bible by using the phrase "original text") they all had the same color headband and then when it became a show, they changed the titular ninjas's uniforms to be less uniform to sell toys. As my college professor once said, "No one wants to be sold anything, but people love to buy." Aw man, I had so many TMNT toys as a kid. I had a vehicle that had spiky rollers on the front that I fell on knee-first once and achieved scar status. But the best one was the van. Those heroes in a half shell had so much bulk they simply wouldn't fit in a standard car, so they went all out and invested in a van that was turtle-themed with cannons and various other armaments. So sick! I dressed up as Leonardo for Halloween a couple years in a row to show how big a fan I was (shout out to my mom who sewed the costume and pretty much made it up from scratch). 11. Foot-Pedaled Cars - The Flintstones Rob Bixby, CC BY 2.0 , via Wikimedia Commons While this one wouldn't necessarily be my favorite one to pilot, as it comes with a heavy helping of exercise, it is undoubtably iconic. This thing is like the grandfather of the steamroller. Two giant stone wheels span the width of the vehicle, there's no windshield so you can't get moving too fast, and it's powered by foot. Nevertheless, if it came with a side of living with dinosaurs, I'd be 100% in. I mean, the Flintstones have a freakin' pet dinosaur (and they got so inventive with name they just used the first two syllables of the word dinosaur). When the car tips over courtesy of the brontosaurus ribs in the opening credits, I bet they had to recruit all of Bedrock to get that thing tipped back upright again. What a heavy beast. Final Thoughts I'm not anyone that will be mistaken for a gear head. I've changed a handful of tires in my day, and my oil a few times, but I'm no Marisa Tomei. I'm not the one you come to when you want to hear about Positraction (I don't even know if it is deserving of being capitalized, I'm simply attempting to show proper respect on the off chance it's due). But when I see a car that looks cool, or can do something a normal car can't, I sit up and take notice (and maybe point dramatically at the screen to recreate the Leonardo DiCaprio meme from Once Upon a Time in Hollywood). I like what I like and I can't always delve into it with much more detail than that. Good news for you: if I'm way off the reservation, you can let me know in the comments where I've led the flock astray. Thanks!

By CJ Tiernan What does Captain mean to you? In the military, they rank pretty high. On board a ship (sea or air), they are in control of your fate. In gym class, they pick teams. I think we can all agree those are three equally important jobs. Yes, the Captain is in charge of making important decisions. It is with that understanding I acknowledge the gravity of the following list. Below is my Top 11 List of my Favorite Captains throughout media (and one real life character) that I’ve ever encountered. Please enjoy. 1. Raymond Holt - Brooklyn Nine-Nine Portrayed by the late Andre Braugher, Captain Raymond Holt is a very stoic, serious character. He is the straight man (despite the fact he’s gay) to many of the antics of the chaotic characters that haunt the Nine-Nine. As the leader, he is imbued with the power to endow poignant words of wisdom or put his foot down when the need arises. However, my favorite is when he breaks free of that mold and behaves erratic himself (like the time he became addicted to Kwazy Cupcakes). He is a role model and a stand up, uncompromising officer of the law. Salute. He’s also an epic wordsmith. 2. Captain America - Comics/MCU Not since Jesus has there been a character with such an unflinching moral sense of right and wrong. It is often a trope that superheroes will not kill the bad guys, but will instead leave them tied up and lying around for the police. However, they often neglect the reality of a concept known as collateral damage. Good ol’ Steve Rogers here is not gonna stand for collateral damage. He’s out to save everybody. That’s why it’s fitting his “weapon” of choice is actually a defense mechanism (shield). 3. Jack Sparrow - Pirates of the Caribbean Captain of The Black Pearl, Jack Sparrow is the unique case of a captain which we meet at his lowest and he never really strays too far from the bottom. In the first film (far and away the best), he is solely in pursuit of getting his ship back. A pirate captain with neither a seafaring vessel nor crew to sail it is a sad sight indeed. Johnny Depp’s portrayal is nothing short of perfect. 4. Cap'n Crunch - Cereal With the iconic blue hat and the white mustache flanking his rotund nose, there’s no denying Cap’n Crunch has left an indelible mark on breakfasts nationwide. Whether you lean toward the golden goodness of the original or prefer the splash of color of the berries (or [clutches pearls] the Oops! All Berries variant), it’s the sweet treat that can’t be beat. I do wonder whether the “C” on his cap stands for Captain (excuse me, Cap’n) or Crunch. 5. Captain Hook - Peter Pan If you’re gonna pick a person with a disability as a mortal enemy, picking one who replaced their hand with a weapon is bold choice. Forever-boy Pete taunts Captain Hook and his sidekick Smee, which is tough because Hook is already taunted by the ticking-clock croc that ate his hand. Talk about kicking a guy when he’s down. Am I siding once again with a pirate? I think so. 6. Captain Planet - Cartoon TV Show This guy uses the funky power of ‘70s band Earth, Wind, and Fire (🎶Do you remember…🎶) plus a splash of water and a vital organ (heart) to get people to recycle. It’s… cooler than it sounds. He’s a blue guy with a green mullet and a red speedo and he gets kids (Planeteers) to sport hand jewelry that can summon him when there’s too much garbage or something for them to handle. Man, I’m realizing it’s been way too long since I’ve seen this show. 7. Chesley "Sully" Sullenberger - Pilot, Miracle on the Hudson NASA Ames Research Center / Eric James, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons Hey, hey! Would you look at that! A real-life hero. Sully (sometimes called Tom Hanks) saved a bunch of lives by landing a commercial plane in the Hudson Bay when the plane hit a flock of birds shortly after takeoff from LaGuardia in New York. He (and possibly Evanescence) saved all 155 people on board (although their stuff probably got wet) and is a frickin’ hero. 8. O Captain! My Captain! - Scene from Dead Poets Society Robin Williams gets fired at the end of the movie. What happens next is both a beautiful, heartening scene and a callback (everyone loves a callback). In referencing a poem by Walt Whittman, the students attempt to defend and stand behind their teacher, a teacher which taught them to seize the day and chase their dreams. Good flick! (Also, more of a use of the word captain than an actual captain but, you know, it’s my list). 9. Han Solo - Star Wars First off, nobody rocks a vest like Han Solo. It’s important to me that we get that out of the way. The man has a vest that has pockets, thereby straddling the line between style and function (the vest just missed my list of Top 11 Movie Vests). Also, he Captains the Millenium Falcon, perhaps the greatest space craft in the history of space travel (sorry, NASA). Plus, he’s a smuggler (aka a space pirate). That makes him the third (and final) pirate on the list. 10. Leland Stottlemeyer - Monk Adrian Monk, “The Defective Detective,” is a lot to handle. But with the help of his sidekick, Randy, Captain Leland Stottlemeyer is on the case. Played by the guy who said, “it rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again” in Silence of the Lambs (Ted Levine), this Captain is not messing around. I mean, one look at his cookie duster and it’s clear this San Franciscan officer of the law is an authority figure. Randy only wishes he could grow that mustache. 11. Captain Marvel - Comics/MCU She spends some serious time fighting aliens. Like, to the point where it feels as though Earth is more a tedium than an actual place she wishes to be. Nevertheless, when she fights, she brings the funk. Captain Marvel can fly, is stronger than a Kelly Clarkson song, and manipulates energy. I don’t have a huge sample size, but it’s my belief that if you can survive outer space without a space suit, you’re probably fit to be a Captain. You go, Carol Danvers! Final Thoughts Plenty of members of the military have served the role of captain over the years. Not including them on this list is not intended in anyway to be a slight. I simply don’t know any (other than my brother-in-law) and therefore they aren’t on my list. I’m sure there are some great ones. My list skews more fictional (see the multiple superheroes listed above). I have a few that just missed my list that I left below. If I missed any of your favorites, let me know. Thanks! Have a great day! Captain Morgan - Rum Barbossa - Pirates of the Caribbean The Captain - How I Met Your Mother Malcolm Reynolds - Firefly

By CJ Tiernan I love a good game night. Just hanging out at home, gaming with the fam, is one of my very favorite things in the world. I accumulated a list of my 11 favorite games I've ever played. As a disclaimer, the term "board game" is used a little loosely as several of the games on the list do not have "boards." This term is used in part to distinguish them from games that just use a deck of cards, video games, and the games the Backstreet Boys sang about in the song "Quit Playing Games (with My Heart)." So whether you play with family, friends, or people you found on Craigslist, get on out there and plays these games! 1. The Crew 3-5 Players My family and I have gotten pretty addicted to this game. We have sacrificed multiple weekends to playing this one dawn to dusk. I love this game because it is collaborative and everyone is on the same team. This game is a trick-taking card-game mixed with outer space. There is also a deep-sea version that functions better for 3 player games. Playing this one takes a little time to get a feel for the strategies but once you get it, it's tough to walk away. 2. Catchphrase 2 Teams This is a team game. It combines hot-potato with clue-giving (verbal or physical) for a random word or phrase. It is plenty of fun to play as is, especially in larger groups. However, my siblings and I have spent countless hours playing it as more of a travel game, ignoring the hot-potato aspect and the team elements and just trying to get as many answers as possible before the timer runs out. We've played it in a car and on a plane and played many versions including the O.G., the Music Edition, and our favorite: Catchphrase Decades. 3. Uno Attack 2-10 Players Pictured: Me and two of my brothers playing Uno Attack. Not Pictured: The rage-fueled table flip to come Uno Attack is the best way I've ever found of turning friends into enemies, short of inflicting a physical wound. I love it. It takes the standard version of Uno you know and hold dear and adds several elements of chaos: a random number of cards when you have to draw, dumping all of a single color from your hand at once, and the ability to switch hands with someone. Oh man, when you have a bunch of cards and take someone's hand when they only have a couple cards, you can smile as you break their soul. The "Attack" is more than apt, but in Germany they call it "Uno Extreme," which is also spot on. 4. The Settlers of Catan 3-4 Players (Can Expand up to 6) When I first played "Settlers," it was a lot to think about. There were a lot of different strategies and ways to go with it and it was tough to decipher which would be the best. Now, I'm a Development Cards guy (when possible). One of the fun and unique things about this game is that the board is different every time. It is comprised of a slew of small hexagons that create the large hexagonal board. It combines dice rolls with strategy and resource spending in a real fun way. There are also a ton of fun variations and expansions. 5. Outburst 2 Teams As you may have guessed by the name, in "Outburst" you simply attempt to shout out answers to a trivia prompt. Sometimes, they are really specific names like "US Airports" and other times they are a lot more broad like "What Kids Want to be When They Grow Up." Every time, there are 10 answers on the card. Your answers have to match the card to a get a point. Aw man, is there some heartbreak in this one. You get about a minute to just shout out as many possible answers as you can, but sometimes it can get really quiet. As it says in the instructions, "This Game Is Unfair... MAYBE YOU'VE GOT A GREAT ANSWER... BUT IF IT'S NOT ON THE CARD, DEMS DA BERRIES!" 6. Codenames 2 Teams "Codenames" is a fun and unique game. You create a grid of 25 randomly drawn word tiles (or pictures, depending on the version you're playing) and each team has one person designated as the "spymaster" who has access to which of the tiles each team claims as their own. The "spymaster" has to provide single-word clues in an attempt to get their team to correctly guess the correct tiles and avoid the opposing team tiles (and the insta-loss tile known as "The Assassin"). It can be a little intense trying to think of the perfect word to get your team to guess the largest number of tiles, but if you think of a good one, it's really gratifying. 7. Apples to Apples 4-10 Players The stakes are a lot lower in this game. This is what games should be, first and foremost: fun! This is a silly card game where a judge (rotates around the table every round) has to decide which red card best fits the adjective or adverb on the green card. It is a real treat when you get to use cards like "festering wounds" or "picking your nose." This is also another game with several variations (and the genesis for the adult version: Cards Against Humanity). 8. Monopoly 2-6/8 Players Of all the games that have ever been made, this one may be the most iconic. It also may be the one with the greatest number of different versions (I happen to own over 30 versions myself). I remember playing it against my grandfather when I was young. It is a really fun game with a good amount of strategy mixed with a fair dose of luck. It is also a time investment. I recommend the speed dice they use in competitive tournaments to pare-down the time it takes to play (unless you love losing your whole weekend on a single round of a game like when playing "Risk"). My favorite version I've ever played was the 2000 Millennium Edition. It was so futuristic-looking. Of the O.G. pieces, my go to was always the Top Hat (O.G. is used loosely here, as the original version of the game had no game tokens, with the expectation that you use small household items as tokens). 9. Clue 3-6 Players I love the game "Clue!" It is a great murder mystery for kids. There just aren't enough murder mysteries for kids. You get to choose a character in the beginning (my go to was always Mr. Green. Favorite Color Alert!) and then work your way room to room taking a stab at trying to deduce the murder weapon, the murderer, and the room in which the murder took place. Fun fact: when playing the Harry Potter version with my siblings, I once guessed the exact correct combination on my very first guess. My siblings hated it and we never played again. 10. The Game of Life 2-6 Players "Get lucky...in The Game of Life" was the jingle I remember hearing in ads as a kid. In my experience, that is unlikely. I was never very good at this game, probably because I always went to College and started in debt (that's not gonna hit too close to home in the real game of life for anyone is it?). Nevertheless, this is a fun game and the wheel that you spin in the middle of the board is one of the most satisfying physical parts of any game I've played (unless you spin a 10 when someone is the cop). 11. Trivial Pursuit 2-6 Players I'm a sucker for some general knowledge trivia. "Trivial Pursuit" is the O.G. Plus, it's a lot of fun to collect those colorful wedges. I may have had this game ranked higher on my list, but I usually only had access to games that were made before I was born, so I felt a bit disadvantaged against the adults I usually played with. The requirement to be able to succeed in a range of different topics was a big draw for me. Recommended for any and all fans of trivia and general knowledge. #Moops Final Thoughts Game night is dope. Do you play weekly with friends? Just every now and then with the fam? My grandma used to just play solitaire all the time with an actual deck of cards before Microsoft invented the digital version (she wore the deck of cards down from the standard rectangular shape to more of an hourglass shape. She also referred to a couch as a davenport, which isn't relevant, but is interesting). I would say these days, I mostly play games when my family gets together around holidays and stuff, but I love to play games. I love so many more games than I was able to squeeze on to this list. A couple variations on Pictionary called Pictionary Man and Telestrations are the ones that just missed my list. I'm sure I left some of your favorites off my list. Please set me straight in the comments section below. Thanks! Happy gaming!

By CJ Tiernan I suppose it’s possible someone watched the Harry Potter movies without first reading the books. It’s unfathomable to me, but possible. For those of us that did read the books, we experienced a fantasy world for the ages, full of life and color and possibility. As a result, it set the stakes really high for the movies. Like, really high (James-Franco-at-the-Oscars level high). The characters in the books are so fleshed out and J.K. Rowling utilizes a very visual storytelling method that paints a vivid picture in our minds of each and every character. Long story short: we had expectations. Boy oh boy did the movies deliver. Below is my list of the Top 11 Harry Potter Characters that were Best Cast to fit the descriptions in the book and/or the essence of the character. Enjoy! 1. Molly Weasley (Julie Walters) and Arthur Weasley (Mark Williams) Molly and Arthur are fantastic characters in the book. They serve in a capacity as surrogate parents to Harry since (Spoiler Alert) his are dead and his back-up pair kinda sucks. It is through the Weasleys that we are introduced to the magical world outside of Hogwarts and get to view magic used in really mundane, everyday ways. Molly is tirelessly running a household full of redheads and Arthur is innocently curious like Ariel in The Little Mermaid, obsessed with “gadgets and gizmos a-plenty.” The two could not have been better cast. 2. Professor McGonagall (Maggie Smith) McGonagall has to be two things simultaneously to a young, impressionable Harry Potter. She has to be both supervisor and champion. You have to believe that she’s both willing and able to punish Harry Potter and also has his back. Maggie Smith harbors a twinkle in her eye that is so good in this capacity. She’s got both stick and carrot and completely willing to use both. The professor may be old experienced, but she’s got pep in the step and nothing sneaks by her (unless it’s under an invisibility cloak). 3. Vernon Dursley (Richard Griffiths) What do you have to do to be Vernon Dursley? You have to hate magic and Harry Potter (the person, not the books) and anything that’s weird and out of place. You also have to love Dudley for some reason. Griffiths nails it in almost every conceivable way. He has maybe a tad too much whimsy to fit the strait-laced, by the book (ha, that works on two levels) attitude of Vernon but that’s almost exclusively due to the bushy mustache on his red face. 4. Dolores Umbridge (Imelda Staunton) Lega Nerd, CC BY 3.0 , via Wikimedia Commons In the books, there are a lot of villains. Harry Potter is seemingly the chosen one, in the sense that everybody has chosen to bully/imprison/kill him. He’s like if Oprah saved the world and we all responded by treating her like Ellen DeGeneres or Kanye West. It’s hard out there, is what I'm saying. As a general rule, no bad guy is ever more terrifying than the one with a smile on their face. This one happens to have a smile slapped on a toad face, and be decorated in pink-and-cat everything. It’s like Midsommar: daytime horror. Her casting is flawless, as I’m left only assuming that Staunton is a decent human being in real life. We never see that side in the movies. 5. Luna Lovegood (Evanna Lynch) We had to wait all the way until the fifth book to meet this character and yet she made the top 5. That’s some pretty good casting. Loony Lovegood makes good on the loony bit by moving through life without matching the pace of the world around her. She is marching to the beat of her own drum so aggressively she seems fit to slip into a different dimension altogether at any moment. Plus, she has the world’s coolest specs. 6. Argus Filch (David Bradley) If the word cantankerous was anthropomorphized, it would be nearly indistinguishable from Argus Filch. He is a member of the magic world, but bitter because he does not possess magical abilities himself. He’s the janitor of Hogwarts and goes through life dressed like Christopher Lloyd in Dennis the Menace. They say those who can’t do teach. Is that what’s going on here? Those who can’t do magic, clean up the magic castle? I don’t know. I might’ve considering something in the horticulture family myself; indulge in a little sunshine and rainbows. 7. Professor Snape (Alan Rickman) Snape is a jerk. For like six straight books, he is a total bully to Harry Potter. He abuses his power to cut down and undermine Harry at every turn. He gets a redemption arc at the end of his journey that I don’t totally buy but good for him. Mostly he’s a jerk, and that’s what Rickman plays him as. I never noticed any subtlety or subtext indicating his eventual about-face. That being said, if you’re looking for a bully dressed in black with greasy hair, Alan Rickman is your guy (hmm, that might not be the compliment I intended). 8. Professor Trelawney (Emma Thompson) Professor Trelawney is like the adult Luna Lovegood. She is incapable of living in the real world, with a foot out of time and a head in the clouds. We have the benefit of learning that her skill set is several steps above that of your local tarot card reader, but she’s still largely a spacey prat. Emma Thompson, as she’s done so often throughout her career, disappears into the role. She is nearly unrecognizable with the magnifying glass spectacles and the hippie jewelry. 9. Lucius Malfoy (Jason Isaacs) I’ve read that Jason Isaacs had a profound impact on the aesthetic of his character. This is the character that probably departs most aggressively from his book description. That’s okay, because it works. Lucius is an ominous presence on screen, holding his head aloft in understanding that he is better than the other, non-pure-bloods in his sphere. He opted for a dope cane that conceals his wand and serves as an homage to Slytherin. The end result is a look that screams: menacing wizard elite. That’s exactly what the Malfoys believe themselves to be so: nailed it! 10. Hermione Granger (Emma Watson) She’s not a natural redhead and doesn’t have buckteeth, but Emma Watson is a good enough actress that she pulls off the role without them. In my opinion, she is the best of the child actors (apart from the late entrance of Evanna Lynch as Luna) in the series. In the books, Hermione is a bookish know-it-all (Incidentally, I would love to hear all the ways you guys said that name in your head while you read the books before the movies came out to give you the pronunciation). But, because the Sorting Hat only delivers bangers, she is also in Gryffindor because she is brave and selfless. That is a tough tightrope to navigate for a kid and Watson walked it with much aplomb. 11. Peter Pettigrew (Timothy Spall) How does one go about casting a man to play a character who has spent years as a mouse? Does the actor need to have mouse-like features? Will they simply need to have rodent mannerisms? Do they need to actually be missing a finger? I’ve never been in that situation, so I can neither confirm nor deny the strategy, but I do believe they hit a home run. Spall, a dramatic British actor, delivers a horrible performance (which is to say, a wonderful performance as a horrible person). As a fun little note, if you find yourself disgusted by or angry at a character in a movie or TV show: ask yourself why. Is it pure plot, or is the actor partnering with the makeup and wardrobe department to generate something truly off-putting? We can’t all be Beyoncé but sometimes we didn’t wake up like this, we took hours to look this bad (I believe Billie Eilish could teach a Masterclass on the subject of dressing down). Final Thoughts There are an unbelievable number of characters in the world of Harry Potter. The world is so rich and immense and the movies did such a beautiful job of capturing it with not only the actors, but the production design in successfully translating that fantasy world into a reality. I’ve listed the characters that I felt they cast the best. I would love to hear from you in the comments on who your favorites were. Also, we’re about 6 months from the release of the TV series (I CAN’T WAIT!) so there will be more casting choices to pore over and dissect. Thanks! Have a great day!

By CJ Tiernan There are few instances in this world where one sets out on a journey, bound for greatness, with receipt of an award as the goal (for the ‘gram? Maybe). It’s an honor just to be nominated, after all. That said, there are some pretty wonderful awards out there (I wonder if NFTs were around long enough to have an award). Below is a list of my Top 11 Awards, ranked by a combination of acclaim associated with the award and the design of the award itself. Please enjoy. 1. Nobel Peace Prize ArtemisiaGentileschiFan, CC0, via Wikimedia Commons In my opinion, this is the greatest honor that can be awarded to anyone on the planet. The Nobel Prize says that your efforts, your career pursuit, your area of study, has contributed to (or at least aimed for) peace among the nations and human rights. It’s beautiful. Funny how it came to be, though. The namesake is the inventor of dynamite. Alfred Nobel held 355 patents during his life, but is remembered for two things: explosions and peace. I don’t think those two normally end up in the same file folder, but I appreciate a dude throwing his hand in the air and saying, “my bad. I can fix this” (but, you know, in Swedish or something). 2. Olympic Gold Medal Arne Müseler / www.arne-mueseler.com, CC BY-SA 3.0 DE , via Wikimedia Commons Compete against the best of the best from around the world to see who is the fastest or the strongest or the greatest. That is the promise of the Olympic Games. I imagine that nothing else in this world compares to the feeling of standing atop the podium, pride ushering you to your tallest height, whilst a stadium full of people clad in every color honor you, all while listening to your national anthem blare out the loud speakers. What a humbling tribute. And to think, it was brought about by dudes in togas honoring plural gods. To be fair, American women first competed in the Olympics in 1900, 2 decades before earning the right to vote by the US government, so there’s some level of progression there. 3. Nickelodeon Blimp NickRewind, CC BY 3.0 , via Wikimedia Commons This is my favorite award, visually. It’s a bright color and a fun shape, what more could you ask for? While one does not simply walk into Mordor, they may find the trek has some value if one of these precious little dirigibles is waiting at the end. The Blimp is issued at the Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards. Kids both say the darndest things and issue the darndest awards. 4. MTV Movie Award (Popcorn) / MTV Video Music Award (Astronaut) Deidre Woollard, CC BY 2.0 , via Wikimedia Commons The_Cast_of_Twilight_-_MTV_Movie_Awards.jpg: Philip Nelsonderivative work: Scarce, CC BY-SA 2.0 , via Wikimedia Commons Ah, MTV. They were, for a hearty chunk of time at the tail end of the 20th century, the pulse of Americana. First, video killed the radio star, then the iPod killed the video star, then reality TV usurped the music video. That said, a couple of times a year, the stars come out and bask in the glory of these wonderful awards (and… a lot of crazy stuff tends to happen). 5. Green Jacket Pvt pauline, CC BY-SA 3.0 , via Wikimedia Commons Perhaps one of the more unique entrants on my list, the Green Jacket is awarded every year to the winner of The Masters. Played in Augusta, Georgia at the beginning of April, The Masters is the most prestigious of the four golf majors. It is literally a green blazer but, weirdly, the winner has to bring it back. They can parade around in it for a year, but have to return it to the clubhouse. I think if you earn an award, you should get to keep the award (just me?). Traditions and old people can be a little stodgy when it comes to parting with things. Still, it’s green and it’s dope. 6. Heisman Trophy Wisconsin Athletics, CC0, via Wikimedia Commons Fun fact: the very first Heisman Trophy winner (Jay Berwanger) attended High School in my hometown of Dubuque, Iowa. He went on to NOT play football professionally. That would be a really weird decision now. Second fun fact: when he was awarded the trophy, it was not yet known as the Heisman. John Heisman (the namesake) died the next year and the award was renamed in his honor. Heisman was a retired coach who was considered a football innovator. He actually coached basketball and baseball in the college ranks on top of his football duties. In addition to looking really heavy, the Heisman Trophy is famous for the distinctive pose of NYU running back Ed Smith. Desmond Howard made striking the pose in the end zone famous more than half a century later. 7. Gold Glove Ken Lund from Reno, Nevada, USA, CC BY-SA 2.0 , via Wikimedia Commons This is the coolest defensive award in sports. We all know “defense wins championships,” but only baseball makes it the gold standard 😁. I like that a recipient of the award has a special gold patch on their actual glove the following year to show off their hardware during an actual game (if they attempted to use the actual trophy they, uh, wouldn’t win it again. It’s heavy and inflexible). 8. The Grammys "Member of a zZounds, but they are not sure about who took it" (Mason Souza - Copy Editor from there), CC BY-SA 3.0 , via Wikimedia Commons You know what device people don’t use enough anymore? The gramophone! Did you even know that such a thing existed? Guess where the name “Grammys” comes from. The term gramophone is largely considered a synonym of the more commonly heard “phonograph” and much more commonly heard “record player.” Man, the morning commute would be so different if everyone carried one of these behemoths on their laps aboard the train instead of using headphones. 9. Academy Award Christopher Michel, CC BY 2.0 , via Wikimedia Commons The more prestigious (but less fun) of the movie awards, the Oscars honor the best achievements in film. It features a single, golden man lacking identifying features. Allow me a brief diatribe here. A movie is a source of entertainment. You watch one to be entertained. End of transaction. And yet, so many of the movies that the Academy considers to be the very best of the year are crazy boring. I am continually frustrated with some of the movies (Phantom Thread, Past Lives, Nightmare Alley…) the Academy nominates because they are dull, unengaging films with no entertainment value. Make me laugh. Make me cry. Make me feel something! When I watch a two-hour movie (or God-forbid, longer – I’m looking at you, The Brutalist) that was nominated for best picture and it is a giant nothing-burger, I get so upset at the waste of my time. Do better, Academy! (But, again, the award itself is the pinnacle of cinema). 10. Lombardi Trophy Maryland GovPics, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons I love the design of the Lombardi Trophy. You ever watch those videos where an athlete is celebrating their greatest achievement. They have reached the zenith of the sport and as they hold the trophy aloft, some part falls off and breaks. Not gonna happen with the Lombardi. This thing is a sturdy, solid (well, it’s hollow) piece of equipment. It’s not so heavy that it can be dropped easily and it actually floats in water. Plus, it’s named after the greatest coach of my favorite team: Go! Pack! Go! 11. Stanley Cup Alex Goykhman, CC BY-SA 4.0 , via Wikimedia Commons This oversized drinking vessel is exciting because rather than crafting a copy each year for the winner, this is a traveling trophy. They also engrave the names of the players and coaches directly onto the cup, swapping out the oldest collection of names every 13 years to free up real estate for the newest winners. Because there is only one trophy, there is a designated dude who carries it around everywhere. He is known as “the keeper of the cup.” Hey Siri, remind me that I want to be the keeper of the cup when I grow up. Final Thoughts There are tons of awards for all sorts of stuff in this world. If you do something well enough, and people notice, you may just find your way into winning an award. If you do something poorly enough, you might get a pink slip, which is its own special kind of award. I’ll leave a list down below of a few awards that just missed making my list. Please let me know if I have left any of your faves off the list. Thanks! Have a great day! VES (Visual Effects Award) Silver Slugger World Series

By CJ Tiernan How fun is it to watch sports? Whether you're rooting for your favorite team or athlete, or you just love the sport and want to see a good game, sports are a great form of entertainment. I'm often tickled when the announcer calls out the name of an athlete with a delightful name. Sometimes, you hear something and it just catches you. You may have been half-listening, but now the cogs in your brain are churning. Wait, how did I not catch that? That person's name meshes seamlessly with the thing they're doing right now. Fun! Below, I have a list of my Top 11 Athletes with names that most-perfectly fit their sport. 1. Chuck Long - Football QB A quarterback in football throws the ball. Some of the best, most productive plays a quarterback will have is the deep ball. Chuck = throw, Long = far. This name is perfect for a thrower of the football. He played for the University of Iowa (my alma mater) in the '80s, before having a subpar pro career, mostly with the Detroit Lions (where careers have gone to die for almost my entire life). He did win an XFL championship in 2023 as an offensive coordinator, though, so, hat-tip! 2. Chris Moneymaker - Poker Player Moneymaker is his actual last name. Crazy! In a sport where you more literally make money than any other, he burst on the scene winning the World Series of Poker in 2003. He created a phenomena known as the "Moneymaker Effect," as he was the first to earn his seat at the table through online poker. If you question whether someone who plays poker can be considered an athlete, that's fair. Anything broadcast on ESPN, for me, hurdles the (admittedly low) bar for sports status. 3. Usain Bolt - Sprinter J. Brichto, CC BY-SA 3.0 , via Wikimedia Commons I'm an American. Usain Bolt is one of the few times, if not the only time, I can ever remember rooting for the athlete of another country in the Olympics. From his superhuman speed, to his ostentatious demeanor, Bolt was great (and he knew it). For a man whose memoir is titled The Fastest Man Alive, having the surname Bolt (as in bolt of lightning or move quickly) is perfect. 4. Tiger Woods - Golfer Tiger Woods was good at golf. Really, really good. One of the best ever. While his real first name is Eldrick, his real last name is indeed Woods. Woods, as in, the clubs you use for hitting the ball really far, which is something he was also great at. And while woods are now made of, and occasionally referred to as, metal, he has been playing since he was 3 years old, back when they were, at least predominantly, wood, so it still counts. 5. Prince Fielder - Baseball Player Prince Fielder, as was his dad Cecil, was a first baseman and designated hitter. He was an infielder who could mash. While he was more known for his hitting prowess than his ability to play the field, the name is still quite apt. 6. Tim Duncan - Basketball PF/C Tim "The Big Fundamental" Duncan was a post presence. As such, he had a lot of opportunities to finish at the rim. His last name, when said aloud, sounds a lot like the coffee and donut shop that America runs on (Dunkin'). Basketball is a sport filled with high flying dunks, so Duncan is an apt name in the sport, even though Tim was known to finish a variety of different ways at the cup. 7. Homer Bailey - Baseball Pitcher Now "Homer" isn't his birth name, instead it was a nickname bestowed upon him to distinguish him from his father, who was also named David. However, Homer was a name borrowed from his great-grandfather (not The Simpsons), and one he went by basically his whole life. As a pitcher, a homer was not exactly something he was anxious to see, so while it fits the sport, it's not perfectly apt for him. Homer also failed to homer in his 373 career at bats (ah, the good old days when pitchers would hit/were basically automatic outs). 8. Clete Blakeman - Football Referee Clete, short for Cletus, has been a referee in the NFL since 2008. While technically not a professional athlete, he is undoubtably a sports figure in America's biggest sport and thus gets to make the list. It's my list. If you don't like it, make your own. Clete, as you know, is a reference to footwear. The shoes that football players (and referees) wear are often called spikes or cleats. 9. Takeo Spikes - Football LB Spikes is another name for NFL footwear. It also works as a celebration move with the football (If you're looking to learn how to spike a football, let me help you out. Simply hurl it at the ground directly in front of you as hard as possible. There. Lesson learned). As a hard-hitting linebacker, Takeo was no stranger to spiking humans into the ground as well. 10. LaMelo Ball - Basketball PG A guy with the last name ball plays basketball. How fun is that?! It gets better: he has two brothers, Lonzo and LiAngelo, that play/played professionally. I put LaMelo up top because he has played the best of the three (though some think Lonzo will still be the best when it's all said and done, due to his superior defense), but the truth is they all had to overcome the obstacle of massive hype due, in no small part, to their father, LaVar Ball, being, shall we say, boisterous on national TV (oh! I should have said a "Ball Hog!". 11. Margaret Court - Tennis Player I've never seen Margaret play tennis. She retired 13 years before I was born. However, she is still the Grand Slams Singles record holder with 24 wins, one ahead of Serena Williams. Her surname is the playing surface upon which one plays a game of tennis. How delightful is that?! Final Thoughts I hope you enjoyed my quirky list. I find it so fun that several athletes had names that so perfectly fit the sport they played. Just to be clear, I ranked them based on how apt I felt the name was, and not at how great an athlete they were, which you could probably tell by my having Chuck Long ahead of the likes of Tiger Woods and Usain Bolt. Kenneth Gainwell (Football Running Back) and Ryan Longwell (Football Kicker) are the two players that just missed my list. If I missed any of your favorites, please let me know in the comments below. Thanks!

By CJ Tiernan As a person who goes by CJ, I'm a fan of a nickname. I'm a really big proponent of having fun with what you call people (as long as said people are in on the fun). I'm also a sports fan. Athletes have long been called by a number of excellent nicknames, dating back to way before ESPN ever showed highlights or dropped a "Boo-Yah!" Below, I've created a list of my favorite nicknames in all of sports. 1. The Minister of Defense - Reggie White Position: NFL Defensive End Team(s): Philadelphia Eagles, Green Bay Packers, Carolina Panthers Years Active: 1985-2000 Full Disclosure: I'm a Green Bay Packers fan. I feel confident that was a factor in ranking this one as high as possible. I love this one because not only is it unique, but it also hits on accuracy. He was first given the nickname in college, as he became a Baptist minister while enrolled. He was a minister that played on defense. They nailed it. 10/10: no notes. 2. The Galloping Ghost - Red Grange Position: College/NFL/AFL Running Back Team(s): Chicago Bears, New York Yankees, Illinois Fighting Illini Years Active: 1925-1927, 1929-1934 This nickname is awesome. It's so awesome, that I chose an athlete who played like 100 years ago. Obviously, I never saw him play, which is too bad because he was up to some weird stuff. He helped invent a football team and named it the New York Yankees. What!? He also played in College Football and Pro Football in the same season. As a bonus, he was born Harold Edward Grange so "Red" is a nickname too. 3. The Flyin' Hawaiian - Shane Victorino Position: MLB Outfielder Team(s): San Diego Padres, Philadelphia Phillies, LA Dodgers, Boston Red Sox, Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim Years Active: 2003, 2005-2015 Another spot-on nickname. He was from Hawaii and he flew around the outfield to the tune of 4 Gold Gloves. Plus it rhymes. You'll pretty much always get bonus points from me if you make something rhyme. 4. Sultan of Swat/Colossus of Clout - Babe Ruth Position: MLB Outfielder/Pitcher Team(s): Boston Red Sox, New York Yankees, Boston Braves Years Active: 2003, 2005-2015 If the movie "The Sandlot" is to be believed, this guy was like the king of nicknames. I didn't even include "The Great Bambino," "The Titan of Terror," or "The King of Crash." Babe Ruth was famously one of the best baseball players of all time. Can you imagine not knowing one of the best players' of all time actual name? Surprise: Babe is a nickname too. He was born George Herman Ruth. 5. The Gravedigger - Gilbert Brown Position: NFL Nose Tackle Team(s): Green Bay Packers Years Active: 1993-2003 Alright, now my Green-and-Gold tinted glasses are really showing. But to be fair, how sick is this nickname? And it came with a move! When he made a sack or a tackle behind the line of scrimmage, he would pantomime holding a shovel and digging dirt from the ground. Epic! I need more grave digging and less Griddy dancing in my football-watching life. 6. The Hick from French Lick - Larry Bird Position: NBA Forward Team(s): Boston Celtics Years Active: 1979-1992 I like this one for several reasons. One, it's just a straight-up insult and Larry was just too midwest nice to say anything (If you're hip to his epic trash talk during his playing days, you may push back a little there). And two, he is one of the best NBA players of all time and this name makes him seem like he backed into success or something. He was also known as "Larry Legend," which is like how you call LeBron James "King James" at 18, because his greatness is as inevitable as it is unassuming. French Lick is a small resort town in Indiana, by the way, where Larry went to High School. 7. The Law Firm - BenJarvus Green-Ellis Position: NFL Running Back Team(s): New England Patriots, Cincinnati Bengals Years Active: 2008-2013 This is my kind of nickname right here. The cadence to his name sounds like a list of several names (like the title of a law firm. Get it?), so someone called him "The Law Firm" and it stuck. You know, like how as an adult, you have people in your life you call by their last name because you played sports with them in Elementary School. This nickname is unquestionably the most memorable thing about his career, although he did finish with exactly double the number of career rushing touchdowns that Red Grange had. Veronica Belmont, CC BY-SA 2.0 , via Wikimedia Commons 8. The Flying Tomato - Shaun White Position: Snowboarder/Skateboarder Team(s): USA Olympian Years Active: 2002-2022 If you're gonna suffer the indignity of being named after propelled produce, you're gonna need a good sense of humor. Shaun is laughing all the way to the bank, as he's an all-timer in the Olympics and at 2 different board sports. He received the nickname because he's a red head. How 'bout that: red heads are people too. 9. The Wizard of Westwood - John Wooden Position: College Head Coach Team(s): Indiana State, UCLA Years Active: 1946-1975 Whelp, I cheated. I sought to play an honest game but here I've gone and put a coach on the list. Technically, he was a 3 time All-American at Purdue, so he didn't not play. But obviously, he's famous for coaching. Specifically, he's famous for winning 10 college basketball national championships in a 12 year span, including 7 in a row. Westwood is in reference to the neighborhood in LA where the campus resides. 10. Slash - Kordell Stewart Position: NFL Quarterback/Gadget Guy Team(s): Pittsburgh Steelers, Chicago Bears, Baltimore Ravens Years Active: 1995-2005 Here's another fun nickname. Slash refers to the backslash (/) that one would use to divide the list of his various positions, as he managed to play many different roles for his teams. He could pass, run, and catch. He even punted in an NFL playoff game once. He was an early prototype for what some of the very best QBs of today excel at. 11. The Round Mound of Rebound - Charles Barkley Position: NBA Forward Team(s): Philadelphia 76ers, Phoenix Suns, Houston Rockets Years Active: 1984-2000 Here's another nickname that we slapped on a great player that feels like an insult. Today, Chuck plays a caricature of himself on TV. Back in his playing days, oh man. I would not want that smoke. While the name clearly attacks his weight, he does also have the nickname "Sir Charles" in his back pocket for special occasions and Business Casual lunches. Plus, the nickname does also highlight the fact that he was a demon on the boards. Final Thoughts There are tons and tons of nicknames for athletes and it was so hard to pare it down to a Top 11. I'm sure I left off more than a few of your favorites. Please let me know who I missed. I will leave you with a small list of the athletes that just missed the cut on my list. El Mago - Javier Báez The Baltimore Bullet - Michael Phelps The Splendid Splinter - Ted Williams The Akron Hammer - LeBron James The Greek God of Walks - Kevin Youkilis Wilt the Stilt - Wilt Chamberlain The Greatest - Muhammad Ali Magic - Earvin Johnson The Playmaker - Michael Irvin Night Train - Dick Lane The Refrigerator - William Perry